The Touch

Jayden is grabbing Jo's finger...

Since Jayden was borned, I am fascinated by having a touch with him, in whatever way. I like to touch his small little hands and fingers, massage his small little feets, smooth out his hair... and I feel my hands are walking on silk - smooth and nice!

Jayden enjoys our touch as well. He likes to grab my fingers when my hands go closer to him, hold my fingers and touch my face when I am breastfeeding him... It is such a great feeling when he touches me!

I am not sure how long this touch will last. Soon after he learns to walk and grows up, the chances of having a touch may become lesser. But I will always remember it because his touch is always touching to me.

Don't ng-ng me

Jayden is growing bigger and bigger everyday, and becoming more and more 'independant'. We used to make him poo-poo before we bath him. He doesn't like that anymore nowadays. He wants to have a say in when to poo-poo. He will compress his lips and show us his unhappy face whenever we ng-ng him.

I like to see this facial expression because I find it cute and funny. Sometimes I will purposely ng-ng him when I know he doesn't want to poo-poo. I did it again the other day and Jo managed to take a photo of it:



I was so naughty! I did it a few times! Of course, I know when to stop so to prevent him from crying out loud. Still, I have to admit I am a naughty mummy... ha!

Jayden learning to sit

Jayden turned to 6 months old today. Before this, he has been trying hard to sit up right while we let him sleeping facing up. That day, we tried to let him sit. He made it... for a while.


He was supporting his body with his hands. He still couldn't sit up right yet. Anyway, it was a very good try!


He was focusing on his feet. He wanted to put his mouth closer to his feet. He would definitely put it into his mouth if he made it.


Too bad... he lost his balance and lean back to the sofa. Haha...

还是这句：愿我身体比你好，你死得比我早

今早电台播了徐佳莹的《失落沙洲》，我的心情又泛起淡淡的哀愁。很久没有听到这一首歌，以为时间久了，就不会再有第一次听到这首歌的那一种共鸣。今天才发现原来不是。有跟我的噗浪的人应该都知道，每一次听到这首歌或看到这首歌的MV，我都会很伤感，然后是鼻酸眼眶湿。。。仿佛我就是歌中的主角。

我记得以前曾在部落格许愿：“愿我身体比你好，你死得比我早。在这之前，让我和他共同度过60年的健康幸福婚姻生活吧！”我了解也同时感受过活着失去亲人的痛苦。虽然终究能够走出悲伤，但那一种痛是永远无法恢复的！我不想他也有如此的经历！而且，依我对他的了解，我想我会比他还能够承受这样的痛，也会比他还能够让我们的孩子面对这一种痛。

我现在的心愿依旧不变，但心中多了一份害怕和寂寞。我对他不算依赖，但一想到愿望有可能成真，和预见在那之后的种种。。。简直就和《失落沙洲》描述的一样。就因为太一样了，共鸣太强烈而使我没有办法抽离。不知道我现在这样预先分段的难过方式，会不会减少我在愿望成真的那一天的那一种痛？

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《失落沙洲》

又来到这个港口 没有原因的拘留
我的心乘着斑剥的轻舟 寻找失落的沙洲

随时间的海浪漂流 我用力张开双手
拥抱那么多起起落落 想念的还是你望着我的眼波

我不是一定要你回来 只是当又一个人看海
回头才发现你不在 留下我迂回的徘徊
我不是一定要你回来 只是当又把回忆翻开
除了你之外的空白 还有谁能来教我爱

又回到这个尽头我也想再往前走 只是越看见海阔天空
越遗憾没有你分享我的感动

我不是一定要你回来 只是当又一个人看海
回头才发现你不在 留下我迂回的徘徊
我不是一定要你回来 只是当又把回忆翻开
除了你之外的空白 还有谁能来教我爱

我不是一定要你回来 只是当又一个人看海
疲惫的身影不是我 不是你想看见的我
我不是一定要你回来 只是当独自走入人海
除了你之外的依赖 还有谁能教我勇敢

除了你之外的空白 还有谁能来教我爱

Jayden's first flight experience

We are back from Kuala Terengganu. Jayden's first flying experience was not bad, so was our first flying experience with him. As mentioned in my previous post, I snugged him into baby sling and gave him pacifier before the flight took off.

The flight from Kuala Lumpur to Kuala Terengganu was very smooth. He fall asleep soon after boarding, and woke up when we arrived. He was so cheerful and happy when he reached Kuala Terengganu. The flight coming home made me worried, but ended up not too bad. He fall asleep after boarding but woke up before we arrived. He was curious at the beginning, looking around and even 'talked' to two young lady passengers who were sitting at the other side. He felt bored soon, and became grumpy but still manageable.

There will be another flying experience soon. We are taking flight back to Kuala Terengganu for coming Chinese New Year. I hope it will be a pleasant one.


Taken before boarding...

Going back to Kuala Terengganu...

We are taking evenning flight today to Kuala Terengganu - Jo's hometown. This is the first time we go back after Jayden was borned. In another words, this is the first time Jayden visits his grandpa and grandma. And also the first time Jayden takes flight... phew~ so many first time...

It is never easy to bring a less-than-1-year-old baby outstation, because there are a lot of things to bring. For example: sleeping-suit, rompers, diapers, milk bottles, wet tissues... and I am a bit more fussy, I want to have matching booties for each day wear romper, and also mitten for each sleeping-suit. Also, we need to bring extra wears in case it gets dirty when Jayden poo poo or wee wee... So we ended up bringing so much things just for 4D/3N trip:


The above is only part of it. Another part of it already packed into our sling bag, like shakers, music pillow for his nights, milk bottles, thermos...

We are taking flight back and I need to be prepared if Jayden feels uncomfortable throughout the flight. So, I will snugg him into baby sling and give him pacifier so to reduce the possibility that he may feel unsecured or ears pain. I hope the 50 minutes flight will be a pleasant one for Jayden, and for us...